MOCK TRIAL WEEK

[themuppeteers]

[Constantine Kermit the Frog has revealed his true motives for bringing you all here. What was once a warm and welcoming house has now become your prison, encased in five feet of snow. If it's any comfort, be glad that the heater and electricity still seem to be working. For now. Perhaps searching for an escape route would be in your best interests.

Let's just hope no one gets stir crazy and tries to kill someone else, hm?]

[MONDAY TUESDAY WEDNESDAY THURSDAY]

((ooc: this is the week log for the mock trial! tuesday-onwards is locked until the motive is posted. on friday, an investigation log will be posted, and a trial will commence on saturday (in-game friday). backtagging is encouraged! have fun!))

Comments

MONDAY

[themuppeteers]

investigating the closet

[tobeginwith]

[Very early on Monday morning, you might hear strange rustling noises coming from the closet on the main floor of the house. Dickens has been in there since he'd first woken up, searching for... what is he searching for? A way out? A clue as to Kermit's motive behind his betrayal? A bazooka? Whatever it is, he's gonna find it.

After that, regardless of whether he did find anything out thanks to his searching, he's standing in the doorway between the living room and the entranceway banging pots and pans together and shouting.]

ATTENTION, EVERYONE! I HAVE SOME VERY IMPORTANT QUESTIONS TO ASK ALL OF YOU!

[If you approach, he'll wordlessly rip out a page from a notebook he's got with him and hand it to you. On it is a small survey to be filled out.]

NAME:
ALIGNMENT:
MOTIVATION:
TRAGIC BACKSTORY:
FATAL FLAW:
ABLE TO MONOLOGUE?: Y/N

[Dickens looks at you expectantly as he hands you a pen.]

Character profiles. Standard part of the writing process. Have to sort out the secondary characters from the protagonists and the villains and the love interests and-- you get the idea.

[themuppeteers]

[There seems to be a box of old film reels in here. Most of them are labeled things such as "FOZZIE'S 5TH BIRTHDAY PARTY :)" or "MUPPET BABY CHRISTMAS". Family relics, mostly.




Oh also there's a bazooka. For whatever reason. But there's no ammo.]

[couldvebeenasurgeon]

[He shoots Dickens a disgruntled look as he approaches. He roughly takes the pen and paper and scribbles out a response. Despite his outwardly attitude, he appears to have no objections to sharing some information about himself.]


NAME: MAD MONTY
ALIGNMENT: PIRATE
MOTIVATION: BOOTY
TRAGIC BACKSTORY: MEDICAL SCHOOL REJECT
FATAL FLAW: FORGETS TO COUNT TO TEN WHEN ANGRY
ABLE TO MONOLOGUE?: Y/N MAYBE


[Handing it back, he sizes the...whatever up.]

Didn't I torture you?

[eggciting]

[what the fuck do you expect her to do with a pen she's a chicken

but okay she'll humor him and pick it up in her beak, writing.... something down. it's all unintelligible scribbles but what else did you expect from an actual chicken, absolutely-not-gonzo.]

NAME: chhfhgh
ALIGNMENT: chfdhgke
MOTIVATION: i gh yiohg gfd
TRAGIC BACKSTORY: fgh hfhgh ghhdhghrhghdh ghh ghrhgh ghhdg hrhghk jgh hrhgk hdhgh gherhvbdhgf hrhgjhjdhf hrhg hdhgh dhgjdhfghdhgh. gfhdhghdhf ghdhghshgh dhghrhghxfh ghdhghsjrhfhg dhfhghdhfgdhg hdhgjdjgfhfh dhghehrhchgf dfhghdhjgh dhghdhgh fhghdjgh fhhshfhfh jdhrhfgjdhg, hdgfdhgfhehhghjdhgfheh fhdhghdhjrhdhg ghdjrhfghd hgfhdgh ghf g gfhdhg wshf whf th the thvhgfh hghfh jghdh ghhg. ghdhgh ghfhgh hghdhgh, ghfhgh ghfhghrjhfhfurj hg dh hgj h h h h ghfhgh.
FATAL FLAW: fhdhfhghhd
ABLE TO MONOLOGUE?: y

[and there you go]

[swedishchef]

[Well! Now isn't this interesting. The Chef quickly fills out the survey and hands it back to Charles Dickens.]

NAME: Hühëhøfëhsøhøwfühürngëd'døüëndk (Tøm)
ALIGNMENT: Chef
MOTIVATION: Tø Cøøk
TRAGIC BACKSTORY: Føød pøïsønïng
FATAL FLAW: Nønë
ABLE TO MONOLOGUE?: Y/N børk

[its_not_fair]

[She stares at the list of questions]

What is this? Alignment? Fatal Flaw? What does any of that mean? And shouldn't all of us have the same motivation: o get out of here?

Re: investigating the closet

[vicholas]

[He cheerfully takes the pen to respond, using it first to scratch his back.]



NAME: LEW ZEALAND
ALIGNMENT: CLOWN
MOTIVATION: TO BE THE BEST BOOMERANG FISH PERFORMER OF ALL TIMES
TRAGIC BACKSTORY: ONCE TRIED TO PERFORM HIS INTERNATIONALLY FAMOUS BOOMERANG FISH ACT BUT HE HAD NO FISH. NO FISH AT ALL. LEW FAILED HIS PURPOSE.
FATAL FLAW: HANDSOME
ABLE TO MONOLOGUE?: Y



Here!

[He throws the pen back at Dickens.]

[sockluck]

[Boober takes the paper, cautiously. He looks over the list, and when he hands it back, it is answered in messy, childish handwriting.]

NAME: BOOBEr FrAGGLE
ALIGNMENT: ...FrAGGLE.
MOTIVATION: GETTING OUT OF HErE!!!!
TRAGIC BACKSTORY: AS A YOUNG FrAGGLE I WAS MOSTLY ON MY OWN, BUT SOMEHOW, I HAVE MANAGED TO MAKE SOME FrIENDS. I AM FOrEVER UNLUCKY, HOWEVEr, AND AM CONSTANTLY ON THE rUN FrOM DISASTEr AND GENErALLY ANNOYING THINGS
FATAL FLAW: EVErYTHING IS OUT TO KILL ME
ABLE TO MONOLOGUE?: Y/N ABSOLUTELY!

[willheorwonthekins]

NAME: Wilkins!
ALIGNMENT: Wilkins Coffee™
MOTIVATION: Wilkins Coffee™
TRAGIC BACKSTORY: Once upon a time, a man did not drink Wilkins Coffee™. I watched him die before my very eyes. I love Wilkins Coffee™.
FATAL FLAW: gotta have my Wilkins Coffee™!
ABLE TO MONOLOGUE?: Y/N

[mostwantedfrog]

... What on earth is this.

[Your lovable host is here just in time to get one of these surveys. Oh, whatever- he might as well.]

NAME: Const KERMET
ALIGNMENT: am frog.
MOTIVATION: to destroy you pitiful moppets.
TRAGIC BACKSTORY: is hard to live in russian winters as frog. several thousand siblings died. is tragic.
FATAL FLAW: i have no flaw.
ABLE TO MONOLOGUE?: Y/N what kind of criminal does not know how to monologue!

[asksforsolittle]

[UGH you again with the early morning noise and the shouting. Jareth had just barely finished his breakfast when the clanging draws him out into the living room. at least this morning he's running into you with a shirt on?]

Mr. Dickens. Is that really necessary?

[he snatches the paper from him and looks it over with a scowl. reading. pah. he hasn't had to read in eons, and the words are a little swimmy. he wracks his brain, trying to remember The Before, when there were desks and rulers and instead of Castles and him doing the ruling. after a few moments of concentration, he brings the paper over to the couch and sits down to fill it in. his handwriting is atrocious, but .... magical. what. he's full of sparkles. have you SEEN his hair?]


NAME: Jareth, King of the Goblin City
ALIGNMENT: King. I told you that yesturda.
MOTIVATION: Win Sarah's heart Get out of here and go home.
TRAGIC BACKSTORY: Kidnaped by None of your bizness.
FATAL FLAW: The frog just told us he wants to merdur us all, do you think I'm going to share that?
ABLE TO MONOLOGUE?: Pleez. I'm King.

[biggerbadge]

[...huh]

I will not participate in this tomfoolery.

[its_not_fair]

[Finding her way through a puzzle designed to confuse and kill her? Puh-leeze. This house has nothing on the Labyrinth. Sarah's determined to find some way out of here. Waking up early, she hops down the stairs to the first floor, giving a determined nod to no one in particular]

All right. There's got to be some way out of here. Things aren't always what they seem... maybe we missed something yesterday.

[With that little pep talk she starts scouring the first floor. She's methodically opening each and every cabinet and closet, looking under every piece of furniture, feeling around all the windows, and moving every knick-knack and book, trying to find some sort of secret exit.]

Re: MONDAY

[vicholas]

[Lew didn't seem to have a care in the world. Was he too positive and confident to let it ruin his day? Or was it just a very good facade? Or could it be that perhaps he was just too dumb concerned with his own stuff to realize the full extent of the situation? ...Did he know at all what was going on?]

LONG TIME NO SEE MISTER THE FROG. HOW DO YOU DO?

Investigating The Attic

[asksforsolittle]

[Jareth can't help but be drawn to high places, so once he's had something to eat and cleaned up, he climbs up to the attic. he's kept the door open so he can hear anyone approaching, and starts to rifle through things. you can tell so much about someone by the things they hide. maybe that strange frog has hidden something up here among Emily's things... humans do like to hide their things in attics. the things you learn when you're pretending to be an ordinary owl... he hums to himself as he rummages]

TUESDAY

[themuppeteers]

MOTIVE: 1/3

[mostwantedfrog]

[Good morning! Your lovely bastard host is here to say hello! And to chastise you for not following his directions.]

So.

I cannot help but notice there have been no killings. This is directly against my rulings that I gave you, which specifically said that I wanted you all to kill one other.

Maybe freedom is not enough incentive for you alls? Maybe Keeermit the frog must do more to get you to commit the bloodsheds.

I have... [Constantine just starts digging through his pockets which not only exist, somehow, but are at just the right angle that you can't actually see them, so it looks like he's pulling everything from thin air.]

Let's see, a 2$ bill? An orange Lifesaver... A ball of yarn... No, no, this won't work, this is all too important for me to part with.

What is it that you people want?

... If you stick with me? I can get you what you want.

[Oh no.

Where's that music coming from. Oh God, why is this happening why is Constantine wearing that outfit now-]

Memorial

[muppetlabs]

[The rest of the events that follow feel like a blur to Bunsen. Swedish Chef was important to Beaker and therefore him as well, so the scientist takes it upon himself to hold a wake.

So, here he is, clad in black and still holding Beaker Jr. Somehow there's food prepared for this memorial? Alright.]

Thank you for coming, everyone. We are gathered here today to mourn the loss of our beloved Swedish Chef. He was one of the greatest--

[You know what, no one wants to hear this. And since Bunsen's monologue has nothing to do with science, let's just clip through the part he ends his speech and starts bawling. Good? Good. Feel free to help yourselves to some food.]

[tobeginwith]

[So the chaotic events of that morning may have thrown a bit of a wrench into Dickens' writing plans. No matter. He'll just use the rest of the morning to rework them.

Sometime in the early afternoon, after everything's settled down, you might notice a piece of paper hanging up in the entryway. On it is a list of names, followed by a list of character archetypes:]

Kermit - The Villain
Darles Chickens (NOT ASSOCIATED WITH CHARLES DICKENS!!!) - The Hero
Camilla - ♥ The Love Interest ♥
Chef - The Martyr
Wilkins - The Mole
Boober - The Coward
Jareth - The Anti-hero
Sarah - The Revolutionary
Ditz - The Innocent
Lew - The Catalyst
Jean - The Investigator
Monty - The Rogue
Bunsen - The Analyst

[Weird.

You're free to marvel at the list and discuss it there, of course, but if you're looking for the author of the script, you're going to have to go to the bedrooms. Dickens is in his, though the door is wide open, and the entire room is covered from floor to ceiling in taped-up papers with words scrawled across them. He doesn't look up from his work, but he can probably hear you approach.]

If you're here about the cast list, no, I do not accept feedback. Good day.

WEDNESDAY

[themuppeteers]

Re: WEDNESDAY

[vicholas]

[Lew was a carefree soul. His clownish outfit truly fitted him. A man without a care in the world who just wanted to be a successful vaudeville performer. His fellow Muppets didn't know what to think of him, because there wasn't much to think about. "Oh yeah, Lew Zealand, that guy. He exists I guess".
But Lew didn't mind about them. He wasn't really fond on the other Muppets, not because he didn't like them but because they weren't people he liked a lot. That sentence made sense in Lew's mind. He was too good for them. His boomerang fish act was better than anything they could offer.
The only exception to all this, was, of course, The Swedish Chef. What a great man, the only one among the Muppets who was on Lew's level. A true equal. Lew lived without worries because he knew one absolute truth about himself: He loved two things, and they were fish and power.
But looking back... Looking back maybe, maybe he loved Chef too. He was too busy to realize it. And now it was too late.]

Gone.
He is gone. Gone forever. For what? Some sick amusement?

[Lew didn't cry. He was awfully serious for a clown, but he didn't cry.]

If we don't find out who did this everyone in here will be guilty.

[its_not_fair]

[Having already searched the entire house for clues or a way out and found none, Sarah had half a mind to stay in her room today. However, she's never been one to shy away from a challenge. So she gets dressed, putting on jeans and the Muppet Show t-shirt she found on Monday with a white vest over it.

She's cautious enough to peek out into the hallway before stepping out, just in case that weird coffee-obsessed murderer is lurking anywhere. Once she's confident she's safe, she heads down to the kitchen to make herself some tea.

After her tea is done she heads to the living room with her tea cup to curl up in a chair with a book and try to pretend that yesterday never happened.]

THURSDAY

[themuppeteers]

[muppetlabs]