MOCK TRIAL

[mostwantedfrog]

[Once the house has been thoroughly investigated, Constantine appears again, his pet penguin following close behind him.]

You have found all that you have needed? Excellent. Now, you must come with me to the basement--it is time for a trial.

[He hops away, and if you follow him into the basement, you'll notice that the boarded-up hole in the wall has been cleared away to reveal a winding tunnel. It's not very big--the humans might have to crawl in order to get in. Once you've gotten through the tunnel, you'll find yourself in a massive cave, filled with stalactites and stalagmites. Boober might recognize it. The rocks here have been haphazardly rearranged to resemble a circular trial room. Constantine himself jumps up onto a very high stack of rocks off to the side, staying out of harm's reach.]

Now, your job is to find whoever killed--eugh, what was her name--Carolina or something. The chicken. If you find out who did it and vote for them, the murderer will be destroyed, and you will all go free. But if you get it wrong, which I am fully expecting....

[Constantine chuckles to himself.]

I will destroy you all, and finally take my revenge on all you Mappets.

[He sits back a little, waiting for the discussion to start.]

[TRIAL START!]

Comments

2/3

[tobeginwith]

[He just turns and looks right past the fuckin game again and straight at the audience. Mods included.]

I might as well just bring the dead folks back to life, too. One of those everybody lives endings. I mean, we already threw the rest of our stakes out the door, why bother pretending to have any emotional investment in the arcs and survival of these guys if we can just bring them back and go on adventures through Pokemon or something?

3/3

[themuppeteers]

[And just like that, Camilla pops into existence beside Dickens, clucking in startled confusion. Moments later, all the injuries on Jean's body just... fade away. Wilkins is startled enough by this to hop off of Jean's back and run away, clutching a can of Wilkins Coffee™ to his chest. The battered Funko Pop becomes pristine and new again, and the Fraggle caves' geometry changes back to the way it looked before Constantine's influence. If you look upstairs, everything should be perfectly in order and back to normal, as if nothing at all had happened this week!

Except the Chef is still permadead. That ain't changing.]

[mabear]

...

[She just got here and doesn't know what's going on.]

What?

[mostwantedfrog]

Well, this just ruined the whole point of my attempt to murder everyone.

[muppetlabs]

If you want something done right, you should do it yourself, Mr. Constantine.

Maybe third time's the charm.

[what is going on]

[mostwantedfrog]

I think the bear mother would rip my spine out of my body if I desecrate her home again.

[His voice takes on a particularly whiny quality.]

This wouldn't have happened if I had just had every Mappet here to destroy... Instead of just a dozen weirdos who don't like killing people!

[mabear]

You still have to polish my Funko pops. Just because you can wave your hand and have everything be fixed doesn't mean I won't remember this.

[mostwantedfrog]

This- this wasn't my waving hand. I did not do th-

...

Yes, I absolutely did this, all in penance for what I did, as apology to you, Ms Bear lady. I apologize deeply for thing I did, whatever it is.

[its_not_fair]

[what just..]

I don't understand... What's... What's happening right now?

[vicholas]

Maybe there's not a murderer, but rather, A MAGICIAN among us?

*Important note*

[vicholas]

[Also, he's still naked]

Re: *Important note*

[its_not_fair]

Put your clothes back on!

Re: *Important note*

[vicholas]

Oh right, I forgot!

Ah, but the room temperature is so nice right now! Why bother?

[its_not_fair]

Because most of us don't want to see you naked.

[vicholas]

I never asked you for you to look at me, OK! I'm just minding my business here.

why must lew suffer

[vicholas]

...

[shslmuppet]

[clapping can be heard coming from the vents]